For Sale at Christmastime: Terrifying Fireplace

OH NO! What HAPPENED here? This gives me the heebie-jeebies. What on earth has been incinerated here? It looks like cobwebs but also kind of like someone smashed Grandpa's urn here. Or maybe a whole bunch of Grandpas. It would take more than one broken urn to leave that much dust. I'll tell you what, though. If I were Santa, I'd just skip this place. I wouldn't want to land in that.